In a round about sort-of way.

Well, a frivolous holiday already come and gone, school started again this week with a weird unfamiliarity with being around people and being so inexcusably out of my comfort zone I could hardly stand it. As of yesterday I'm on my first student film crew of the year, gaffing a grad film - it feels really good. Even the sound of gels being rolled up had a certain je-ne-sais-pas. It's exciting to be learning again, although this semester's workload is extraordinarily daunting. But, the more I think about it, the more I think it's the right kind of workload that keeps me on my feet, not in the crazy house (with any luck). 

I'm still getting fairly ahead of myself with my first semester film, but the script is puttering a long to the eventual completion of the first draft. It'll be a challenge, as I'm incorporating a little bit of everything in it (cinematography-wise): a bit of indoor, outdoor and stop-motion photography. I've started to pull together bits and pieces of crew as I go along. Some large issues that are summing up nicely in the form of panicked jolts in the middle of the night are: time (in general), casting, finances and some critical crew positions I feel unprepared to fill. The chunks of wisdom I've gathered from this week have helped me a little to get back on my feet and start thinking about things in a more organized fashion. I've short listed some films to revisit in lieu of this script, to be brought into a style scheme and mindset. I'm hoping this weekend I can complete a first draft and start assembling a basic style package to pass on to my art director (ooooooooo, I've got one of those).

35mm photography (dispersed throughout this post) has been a great jumping point for me this past month into the exploration of creating depth and texture in photos. While keeping me familiar with the medium of film, it keeps me on the up and up about primes and zoom lenses, and it's actually made me much more aware of light on a day-to-day basis. Photography for me, is more of an exercise than an art form at this point, but I do really enjoy the experience of it. Seeing what I can capture, testing different stocks, seeing the results of an error and being delighted with the effect. I've been shooting mostly black and white, to keep me searching for tone, background/foreground differentiation and how to make a subject interesting without colour. It's actually given me a great deal of confidence going into this semester, where I plan to shoot and direct a short film - despite that people keep cringing every time I tell them my plan to do so. The next step to that is to be able to grant my confidence to a camera operator and a gaffer to enable me to move about my set freely. That's the kicker.

Back in Canmore last week I had some smaller adventures - camping in Elbow Valley, stalking a great grey owl with my Nikon, highland dancing in the beer tent at the Canmore Highland Games, going to a different store to buy pants (good god), getting all your drinks paid for because a friend's making loads more money than you, cheese fondues, so much brie for breakfast, rediscovering the wonders of trail mix, failing at making a pretty cake (just tasted good, I guess), introducing my family to some super cinema (Take Shelter) and eating expensive Alberta sushi. The trip felt rather short, but it was nice to catch up on some sleep, see some people I only see once or twice in a year, plus I rather enjoy chilling with my parents (and my dog) - but it sounds like this winter I'll be coming home for two or three weeks, giving me loads of time to muck about the valley.

I hope everyone is having a solid start to their academic year!

A video you should watch, because fish are radical - so is MBARI:

Holy Shmokes.

It's December, ladies and gentlemen, as I am sure you have heard. Yesterday was (thankfully) my last day of classes for 2011 and I have a single exam on Thursday. Although I am not content and I walk away from this semester a slightly estranged person, my mind is already elsewhere and I am ready to move on.

This semester, I think, will go down in my own personal history as "That time you humiliated yourself for the last damned time". My second year film was shot almost three weeks ago and the personal drawbacks were astounding. I have been unwittingly stubborn, outrageously cowardly and excessively self-conscious. I don't know if I've officially turned some sort of a corner (the straw that broke the camel's back, as it were), but essentially I am tired of being doubtful and self conscious, nervous and anxious. I let people walk all over me, and I haven't had the brass to stand up for myself since High School.

Now, I've been like this for a long time. Determined to remain a stranger to new things, outrageously set in my ways, no matter the ridiculousness of my methods. If it took this fall to change me, then it's best for the long run. So I guess for the foreseeable future, I've got an intense internal project going on. As I've got to change the fundamentals of my entire being. It's going to be wildly uncomfortable.

Well, that's that. Now to talk about other things.

Counting up the shoots I've been on this semester, I'm rather proud to see I've been on eleven. Seeing as how I amass experience on a rather alternative scale on set than say, at school, I am pleased to know that I can work somewhat functionally on a set.

I've decided to discontinue my strange video blog, as I have deemed it a extreme 'exercise in narcissism' and we don't need any more of that flying around the internet. But in it's place,  I have started a new Tumblr, known as For Freak Steaks. It was inspired by a friend's blog, Please Look. Basically I wanted a place to assemble bits of photography and cinematography that I can just amass as I'd like, draw upon as inspiration and practice for the eye. As a drive to further my knowledge in film history and technique, I am pairing this with my film journal. I'll watch a film, write up a page on it and then take some screen captures of what I thought looked fantastic. The examples I'm pulling have many motivations for singling out, whether I like the use of practicals, the depth of field or the lighting.

I'm really stoked on Christmas this year. Mind you, I don't think I've experienced a Christmas yet that I haven't been stoked for. I haven't really been home sick, as I spent two weeks hanging out in Canmore in August, I just feel I need to be with people who know me and care about me and stuff (i.e. my family). My Mom goes crazy with Christmas, so it's always full of people and food and fun things to do. Plus, this year as most of everyone's Christmas gift, my family's taking a trip to Mexico for a week! I haven't been traveling for a while, our last family trip was probably six years ago. I'm saddened by the prospect that this might be our last family vacation, but I am thankful for it and I think it's going to be a ton of fun.

Anyways, that's all I've got on my mind lately. I hope everyone's having a superb start to the holiday season. Give everyone you love in your life a bear hug and build a gingerbread house or something.

Cheers.

Haw-gust.

  Oh hi there. Well, I'm pretty excited we're well into August and I'm still on my feet. My semester officially ends, with a bit of a fizzle, on Wednesday. But I'm not worrying too-too much about that. Thursday we're having a bit of a fancy-pants shin dig to shake off the chills of this past semester and Friday I travel, and continue traveling through until the 28th of August. I think the next three weeks are going to be a supreme time to clear my head, shake things up a bit, tie up some lose ends and just start off the fall semester with a running leap. I've got a sweet fall lined up, with three film production classes, a studio art class and a math course by distance. I'm far beyond excited to see all of my film chums again, the summer just hasn't been the same without seeing them all in one place a few times a week, not to mention working on wondrous projects with them. I'm excited to, once again, become immersed in an atmosphere of every kind of creativity, of knowledge and experience and wonderful things. It's going to be a riot.

  With the rainy weather gone, the gardening has taken off a little bit. We've got strawberries and peas that have been picked a time or two and have a number of other things well on the way. The four Brandywine tomato plants I started late from seed are just rocking it out in the raised beds. I didn't have much hope for them at first, but they've got glorious green foliage and are shooting skywards! On my two store-bought cherry tomato plants, we've got some wee green tomatoes just starting to come round. The pumpkin keeps coming back from the dead, it seems. Poor thing. But the blossoms keep coming, but no pumpkins starting quite yet.

Asides from a damn cat in the neighborhood feeling that he must use my garden as his litter box at every opportunity, I think things are going relatively well. I sowed a number of seeds directly into the garden a week or two ago. We've got radishes, violas, kale and a variety of lettuces coming up already. I'm really enjoying having the raised bed. Planters are fine and all, but it really doesn't compare to having a plot of earth you can call your own. I've packed a lot in there, and hopefully by September, it'll be chalk full of great things. Four Brandywine tomato  plants, a yellow pepper plant, a red pepper plant, a mini pepper plant I started from seed, and rows of violas, kale, mescluns, lettuce, romaine, radishes and butterfly flower mix. I'm not sure what will win out on space, but I just can't wait until it's a full, lovely garden.

The bordering gardens were planted up by the ladies downstairs and they are just marvelous. She came out of one patch with an armful of squash this afternoon and has a most exuberant potato patch. I'm a little jealous.

Last night I finished the last of the Harry Potter books for the second time. Reading all the books through once again has, I think, brought out my real love for certain ones. Before this time through, I had always had an affinity for the fourth book in particular. But I found myself absolutely loving Prisoner of Azkaban, Order of the Phoenix and even Half Blood Prince! The Deathly Hallows, on my second (much more conscious) reading through, was much better than I remembered it. I had picked it up at midnight the day it came out and promptly stayed up all the next day reading it cover to cover. I didn't remember much of it. So this second time through was really, really nice. I could make some sense out of the last film and I could sort of see where they were coming from with some of their decisions, I suppose. I think I'm going to go see The Deathly Hallows Part 2 a second time with my mom and aunt when I visit home in a couple of weeks. A revisit after reading the book and after some deliberation will make up my mind for certain, I think, whether or not I like the last installment of the Harry Potter films.

I have started a film journal, at long last. It's more an exercise for me to remember what I've seen, my opinion on what I've seen and names. The best I've been able to do in film class so far in a name-drop heavy environment is just sort of... smile and nod, perhaps googling names under the table on my phone. I always try to record the same set of details for each film: title, year, country, director, cinematographer, actors I know and actors I do not. I then will go on, in point form, highlighting interests or conflicts or shots I liked. Usually at the end I'll give a general interpretation of the entire thing and a star-rating, which I really have no system for. Perhaps if I find another aspect of the film mind blowing, i.e. editing or costumes or somesuch, I'd write down that too. I've been trying to get through a few films a week or more and have finally taken in film such as Forrest Gump and Breakfast at Tiffany's, and discovered some likes and dislikes amongst The Secret Life of Walter Mitty, Jailhouse Rock, The Big Red One and Wanted.

I haven't had bok choi in years, but have recently rehashed my love for it. The first time I (tried to) stir fry it in a bit of oil and garlic, and that turned out a little gross and slightly singed. Then I discovered a little trick in wake of my every-so-often bacon bender I seem to go on. Bok choi is lovely when stir fried in a bit of bacon grease. I just cut the bok choi in two and fried them just like that. They came out of the pan slightly crunchy and lovely. You end up with this amazing vegetable that smells and tastes every-so-slightly like sweetened peanut butter. It's rather bizarre, but I greatly enjoy it. Plus, bacon + bok choi = a solid Sunday night meal. I am not going to lie.

Anyways. I really do feel this irritating, rage dump of a summer melting away. I think some time on vacation will really remedy this brain-in-a-box feeling I've been enduring for a number of months. The start of a fresh semester with lovely old faces and wonderful new faces will, no doubt, help as well. Anyways, I'm going to go stand in front of a bookshelf for a half hour and contemplate what I am going to read next. I have a brain ache that keeps punching me in the face.

I'll leave you with my most recent video blog... see more over at Kingfisher Says.

August 5th, 2011 from Laurel K Brown on Vimeo.

Nighty night.

The end of the semester and Creature 003.

  Happy end of April! It's been one hell of a month, I'm not going to lie. It seems that life is becoming increasingly dense and uncertain and bizarre. I definitely am not minding it as much as I thought I would!

  I had a super two days with my pal Aerlan this week. It was a super surprise because he was supposed to mosey on down to Seattle for a visit. First, we went to a super hot pot place down on Victoria Drive (highly recommended - Fatty Cow Seafood Hot Pot!) where we partook in a little bit of everything, which included some "out of the comfort zone" foods such as oysters, liver and kidney. It was pretty tasty, except for the weird things. But, hey - now I can say, "I've totally eaten pork kidney," which I suppose I can consider a point of pride? The next day we had a super marathon of The Outsiders, American Graffiti and MASH followed by a strange dinner at a shifty Chinese food place that had horrible service - but hey, all the restaurants you walk into randomly can't be winners.

  I had a great dinner with my friend Amanda when she came through town on her way to spend a glorious year in Taiwan (take a peek at her travel blog!) when we walked around on Kingsway searching for some chow. We came across a strange place called Mega Grill. Seemed to have a little bit of everything. Lamb souvlaki for ten bucks (no objections here!) followed by surprise belly dancing. Yes, belly dancing. It was cool for about a minute before it got horribly awkward in that tiny restaurant. But again - it was a curious experience, and I'm starting to not mind those.

With school over - films screened and exams all wrapped up, I finally got around to sewing a bit this week. Creature 003 is up on Etsy! I think his limbs turned out pretty adorable, as did his teeth and eyebrows. The overall shape of him is kind of funny - but hopefully someone will give him a happy home! Sewing on my days off was such a zen experience. I'd put on some Star Trek Next Generation and stitch all afternoon! I'm looking forward to seeing what sort of felties I create all summer long! Remember to keep an eye out on my Etsy shop. I'm really going to be trying to spruce it up and keep it nice and stocked up from now until Christmas! So many felties!

I ended up taking a couple of courses over the summer - but with only one day actually affected by this I've been plotting out my summer beyond the work place. I'm bummed out I have to work so much - but its something I've been slowly coming to terms to, the fact that I'll be working jobs like this for quite some time. But I've got a solid job that pays alright, and I'll hang on to it until a better opportunity comes a long.

The end of the semester has really brought a change in mindset for me. I think the past four months have really gotten the ball rolling in a sort of "mental maturation" that had been overdue for a happening. After eight months of film school and meeting some of the most fantastic people, I think I've really started to gain new perspectives and at least get a foot hold in the seemingly unscalable wall of the lazy, procrastinating and boring self. I've definitely had a shift in my mind set and it seems that I'm much more positive and am regaining the passion and drive that I had lost in the previous two years of University.

Creator and Monster - and vise versa

The summer seems bright - I was not looking forward to four months of nose to the grindstone cashier work. But things keep popping up that will break up the monotony. I've told myself that by the end of the summer I want three complete short films written and directed by myself as well as a stop motion done on 16mm and the Bolex. I've got an idea or two that I'm slowly developing for the shorts. I basically just want to get out there and make films. It's something I've never really done. Any project that I've done in the past five years has been for school or a paid gig that I didn't have much interest in. With everything I learned this past year, I think I could really make some personal headway in developing a storytelling and visual technique. It's going to be awesome! Some traveling might be in the future as well - and that's always awesome!

I've got two fellow filmmaker shout outs to make this week:

CHOCH! Filmmaker Brendan Prost - creator of Generation Why - premiered his next feature, Choch, at Woodwards a couple of weeks ago. My review for it should be up in the next few days! Now that he's back in Calgary for the summer he's looking to get the word out. I believe he's going to be announcing some Alberta bound screenings in the next couple days. Choch is fantastic - a look at the identities we find ourselves putting up for the sake of fitting in as youth and as well as adults. Shot on a supremely modest budget, this indie film is worth the trip! Go check out a screening and tell your friends! Independent films greatly depend on word of mouth and small promotions. Prost's work improves with each project - take a gander at his previous work. He's got a new website up!

The Long Road Home! Hailing from Capilano U, Adam and Alex are working their way across country to their home towns in Ontario to start production on their first feature, The Long Road Home. They desperately need your support (and maybe some cash, if you've got any to spare). If you find yourself in Ontario this summer and want to lend a hand, get a hold of them via IndieGoGo! Or drop them a donation or a supportive word or two - whatever you can spare!

Support independent film!

I should really be asleep already, as it's a dense weekend filled with work and house hunting! Yes, I am moving! It's going to be insaaaaane!

I did a bit of a photo shoot of my firebellied toads as I fed them the other day. I've had these toads a very long time and every so often I just need to document their little handsome faces!

In other news, in an attempt to improve my speaking/conversation ability, I have started a video blog for the sole purpose of talking about anything and everything. My first post will be up shortly - but check it out at Kingfisher Says!

Farmers Markets and Film School

So, oh my goodness - Vancouver Farmers Markets are the bees knees. I had neglected to go, mostly because I'm lazy - and went the first week of September and again this past week.

The first week I went, it was a nice sunshiny day - I bought a couple of buttons to start. Then I perused the fantastic assortment of goodness! I bought corn from Chiliwack, carrots, green beans, all kinds of plums, all kinds of tomatoes, pork sausages, bread and THE BEST PEACHES EVER.

On another note, I've discovered the kind of people who shop at these markets seem the finer kind. I dropped $15 dollars, and after scouring the ground for a few minutes, I mentioned to the info desk that maybe perhaps if anyone might turn some in, that it would be great if it could be returned to me. Needless to say, I was positive I would never see that $15 again. This thought was quite depressing, as I fully intended to spend it on delicious vegetables. Whilst I was deciding which tomatoes looked the most exotic, the kind woman from the info desk came to find me - saying someone had found and returned my $15! I was sooo very happy, not to mention grateful!

This past week I picked up more tomatoes (more different kinds), peaches (so, so good), corn, bell peppers and carrots. This was after a trip to T&T to pick up some steamed buns, which I just can't get enough of apparently.

So, this week was my first week in the SFU film program. I downed a cappuccino (yes, I've finally broken into coffee) and approached the Woodwards building downtown. I walked into that classroom and it felt like my heart had dropped into my stomach. I've been waiting for this for a long time, and it was almost surreal being there. It was both gratifying and nerve wracking, glorious and humbling.  At last surrounded by people who share the same passions, yet who come from so many different backgrounds. There's a fellow from Germany, a fellow from the Czech Republic, folks from Alberta, from BC, from Africa! All with different aspirations and ideas!

My lab time was incredible! We were given black and clear film leader, exacto knives and sharpies to draw, colour and carve into this film... Learned how to splice properly, which was fantastic. And the sheer differential in ideas between 6 people given the same media in the span of 3 hours. I'm excited to see the rest of the class' work next week!

I've found out I'm in the last shoot group in the semester, so I'll be shooting my first semester film the beginning of November. It seems a long ways away, but I have lots of time to formulate my plan. We're each given basic equipment and two one hundred foot rolls of 16mm film, and we can do whatever we want. We can work alone, we can work in groups. Next week we start getting into the nitty gritty with the Bolex's. It'll be interesting to see how I'm actually supposed to use one, instead of just sort of guessing.

In book news, I highly, highly recommend David Mamet's Bambi vs Godzilla. If you have any interest in the film business, screenwriting, film history... it's a fantastic book chalk-full of Mamet's extremely intelligent insights on many of the strange discrepancies in Hollywood and it's politics. I'd say it's one of the better books on film I've read! I've just started to read Steven Pinker's The Stuff of Thought and am so far finding it goes in one ear the out the other, but hopefully I'll find a foothold in this psychology mind-brain mumbo jumbo.

In film news, I've been trying to watch more new films these days. I have a list about 43 miles long filled with films I have yet to see, everything from Citizen Cane to the Godfather Part II to Dirty Harry. I caught up on films like Se7en, Man on the Moon and Juno earlier in the week. Se7en was mentioned about a half dozen times in my first film lecture and lab, so it was bumped to the top of my watch list. Juno was alright. I've heard from lots of people that it's horrible and lame, while others hailed it as brilliant. I'm just going to say it was pretty darn adorable, and that's that.

I watched Fantastic Mr Fox, whose level of detail truly blew me away. Although Wes Anderson irks me a bit (although he does produce superb and unique films), Fantastic Mr Fox is a real piece of work. The detail in each and every character - yet the small reminders of the imperfections of the artist, the shifting of the fur during stop motion, some fingerprints in clay. The styling is just genius. The tall, lanky, awkward foxes; the thin, devlish rats; the bizarre enigma that is the opossum. Wes Anderson and Rauld Dahl might be a good combination after all!

Another film I just watched was John Carpenter's Big Trouble in Little China. And although this seems a rather typical 80's kung fu action flick, I've got to say that it was a lot of fun to watch. Kurt Russel's character of the 'hysterical American' just cracked me up. I was also a big fan of his all-American mullet and 'wife-beater'. I may need to invest more time in John Carpenter's films. I believe the only other of his I've sort of seen is Escape from New York, which I may or may not have fallen asleep in.

If you want some amazing classic film fun, I'd recommend checking out this YouTube video, in which classic movie scenes are dubbed over by Spongebob Squarepants, Patrick Starr, Squidward Tentacles and Sandy Cheeks. So, so great.

Anyways, I hope everyone's having a great September/start of their fall semesters. I'm trying to get my hands on another part time job to fill up my weekends, but that search isn't going so well.

Ps everyone, Rainbow Owl is still on sale! He's gotten a tremendous amount of views, but no takers just yet! He's sitting here on my Wii feeling quite lost without a home. Anyone? Bueler?

Via Sponginess Gifs!